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Who’s the giraffe in the m&s slacks?

Not long ago I read a survey revealing that women think about being fat about as often as men think about sex: ie, loads. I hate to be unsympathetic, but maybe if we ate fewer crisps we wouldn’t have to.

Our food dysfunction extends from the size 00 wannabes who worship celebrity anorexia, all the way over to the size 16s who apparently represent average British womanhood. Neither is healthy or sexy, but as disorders they have little to do with fashion, which is why the fuss over models’ BMI is beside the point.

Self-starvation is a symptom of psychic distress,

but we got fat by accident when we forgot that eating is not solely about nutrition (which is joyless and faddy) or pleasure (which is mere greed) or ritual (which is pointless formality) but a virtuous trinity of all three. The connection between these disorders and the goddesses who stalk down the catwalk seems tenuous.

If, however, tall and slender leaves you feeling inadequate, take a look at Erin O’Connor on M&S’s in-store billboards. The havoc a truly terrible pair of trousers can wreak on famous beauty is nothing short of miraculous.

SHE’S GOTTA HAVE IT