catching up on current affairs
In the last week I’ve taken delivery of a box of Premium Wu-Long, a rare tea grown on the slopes of Mount Wu Yi Shan which Chinese scientists are calling ‘the world’s most powerful fat burner’. I’ve visited an acupuncturist and written a large cheque for three bottles filled with very small, very brightly coloured pills which he promises will fix my dodgy Achilles tendon. And I’ve allowed myself to be strapped into a Spanish invention which is supposed to improve muscle tone by frying the bod with electric current. (And we thought the medieval peasants handing over their last florins for a piece of the
true cross were a credulous bunch.)
SHE’S GOTTA HAVE IT
I’ll let you know about the tea and the pills, but I am SO sold on the electric bed. At first I wondered why anyone in their right mind would choose Luzmon therapy over, um, just taking exercise. It’s not cheap and feels really rather peculiar. Then I got it; Luzmon means an hour of enforced inactivity with magazine or TV, while invisible electrical hands pummel weary flesh in a robotic, non-judgmental sort of way. It’s a veritable nirvana for working mothers. And weight loss too? Pinch me, I must be dreaming.
SHE’S GOTTA HAVE IT
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